Emotions of a New Empty Nester
And in the blink of an eye he’s off to college. Quinn is my youngest and it’s hard to believe he’s old enough to head out to Grand Canyon University. I have such mixed emotions. My husband Jeff often says to me, “You don’t journal, you blog and post”. He’s right, I do share my life with all of you and there is something cathartic for me in doing so.
When I say “new” I mean like the car just pulled down my driveway 5 minutes ago. I just have three things I want to share.
1. I started thinking back over the last years. I am thankful to say I have no real regrets. I was so far from a perfect mom, I called him a psychopath, I pinched him, I forgot him at home when he was only 5 (the list could go on and on) but I found peace when I thought of these words, “I did my best”. I messed up lots but my heart was always to show my children love and more importantly to remind them how loved they are by God.
2. I prayed this morning, “God, my #1 desire is for Quinn to know you better when he graduates.” I don’t know how to explain it but I ‘heard’ God say, “I’m completely in agreement. That’s my #1 desire too”. I felt this great comfort when I was reminded that God and I are on the same side cheering Quinn on towards the same goal. Honestly, I’m not super concerned with his grades, his major, or even what mistakes he’ll make. I just want him to know God better and better.
3. I’m super excited to have more time to spend with my amazing husband Jeff. We had so much fun before we had kids and I have no doubt that we’re going to continue to have loads of new adventures, great conversations and good times! I am thankful that even though the kids took up a good chunk of our time the last 20 years, we still made our relationship a priority.
I'm sure going to miss Quinn. He's been my side kick for many years. My husband travels quite a bit so it was so nice to have such a fun son to hang out with!
I'm not wearing sunglasses because it was super sunny. They might have been hiding a few tears!
I’ve shed a ton of tears as I’ve been writing this but I feel better. Thanks for listening and I hope if you too are sending kids off to college or other destinations that my sharing helps in some way.